It's just a automated security device, dang things are everywhere and they all say the same exact thing...just this one time it made sense.
It's a drone all right, together with his automated security device.
Vivian: Attempt to hide the pickaxe under the folds of that monster's body. What pickaxe? There was nothing here, just an innocent and curious bystander!
“Ma’am, what are you doing with that pickaxe is illegal.”
“Pickaxe, what pickaxe?”
man I know we won't convince them of anything, but I just want to rant.
Security: Actually be trying to scavenge off the monster's corpse as well.
You can hear the Security guard groan under his breath as he rolls his eyes at you. He continues with a weary voice.
“Ma’am, this place is off limits due to concerns for public safety. That means you’re engaged in illegal looting."
"It's wildlife not private property, picking things off the ground can't be looting," you protest.
"Unsanctioned waste collection operation then. Whatever it is, it has to stop.”
Maybe it is the annoyance of your path being blocked, or that you have to deal with this idiot on your day off, but anger flares up in your chest, urgent and unwilling to be ignored. It seethes and sizzles red hot behind your lungs, and before you even realize it words bubble up and steam out of your mouth. It is as if someone else had taken control of you, reducing you to a mere observer of your outburst.
“Why is it off limits, exactly,” you yell, “if it's free for the flies shouldn't it be free for the people as well? In a few days it's going to rot and be a huge nuisance for the nearby downtown--really, we're doing you a favor here!” You cross your arms and stare surly at the guard. “Not like they can even eat all this if they wanted to either.”
“Whoa, back off ma’am.” The guard raises his hands to calm you down. “We’re doing this to protect you, no need to get snippy about it.”
“My butt you’re doing this to protect anyone!” You point at the back of his scooter car. “What’s with all the power tools over there? You just want to scavenge the choice bits for yourself!”
That seems to get under his skin. He is no longer addressing a citizen but you, personally, when he speaks up. “We take huge risks taking down these beasts because no one else can do it! It’s just fair that we get something out of it.”
“That’s a bold faced lie, mister. You happened here by chance, after we did! Where’s your hunting party then, huh?”
“Well, yea, well, you don’t have a hunting license either!”
Claim you killed the beast through a convoluted plan after tracking it for several days, and so have rights to its body.
Tell the Security not to worry, because the monster is dead and therefore cannot be made to suffer further, nor can it harm any of you. That should appease the Security enough to leave.
Janice steps up with a placating smile. “Actually, I do.” She holds up a little laminated card.
The guard snatches it from her hand and looks it over. “This is a fishing license.”
“And that’s an aquatic monster.”
“Don’t be daft. There’s no bodies of water in sight.”
Janice checks his nametag. “Joe, can I call you Joe?”
“That’s officer Mourad to you.”
She continues with a smooth tone. “Officer Joe, I can swear that I saw the creature emerge from the Reservoir because my friends and I have been stalking it for days. You’re welcome to come with us to see its tracks for yourself.”
“That’s on the other side of the city!”
Janice shrugs. “Not my problem. That’s where we’re headed anyway.”
Joe takes out a little book of city ordinances and thumbs through it angrily. “A ha! Chopping up a monster is Animal Cruelty, a serious offence indeed."
Daniel speaks up. "You can't be cruel to dead things, I'm dumb but even
I know that."
“I'd listen to him, officer. My brother is an expert in dumb." Janice says and winks at Daniel.
Joe tosses away the rule book. “That’s it, I don’t have to listen to this. I’m taking in all of you, get back in your car and follow me to the precinct house.”
“What! On what charges?” Janice steps up to confront him.
“I’ll think of something during the drive. Now move it!”
Now what?
